Richard Reeves, author of the book "Of Boys and Men: Why the Modern Male Is Struggling, Why It Matters, and What to Do about It," discusses why men are more likely to commit suicide in the US than women. #CNN #News
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Just so we’re clear. USA have to bring in students for graduate STEM and medical fields because American men are not filling those roles. I read some at least 30% of the doctors in the USA are foreign born. Nothing wrong with that. Just pointing it out.
I think a lot of men have always struggled in the educational system. But men used to go for skilled labor jobs, plumbing, electrical, etc.. These days being the next bezos or musk seems to have overshadowed these skilled labor jobs in a really detrimental way. I also don’t think women being more educated than men is a crisis.
@triple beans
Perhaps you should stop making blanket statements and you might not get the pushback. Just a thought.
@dozzer009 it’s not a blanket statement if it’s based on reality.
@triple beans that isn’t true. I think most women don’t look at your education level, but your intelligence, maturity and the ability to see women equitably, as partners and not subservient beings. I have a college education, my husband doesn’t, but he’s one of the smartest people I know. He’s hard working and we work as partners at home and in our finances. We have a good relationship!
the education system was created entirely by, for, and about men/boys. the more recent changes to how classrooms are run actually benefit boys more than girls (much more physical and interactive rather than just sitting there absorbing info).
In Australia, and i imagine the US as well, when students are encouraged to do vocational streams, girls are encouraged to do the low paid options such as childcare and hospitality, with little chance of development. Where boys are encouraged to do the higher paid plumbing, electrician, carpentry, with better options of running their own high paid businesses.
Interesting that although girls are more mature and advanced than in school, this never seems to translate to boys being told that they should look to girls for leadership etc. Whilst I remember being constantly told that ‘boys will be boys’ and we needed to make allowances for their bad behaviour, whilst they still got more leadership positions and prestige at school.
Men may not be getting as good grades or doing as much study as women, however they still get paid significantly more. Men get more and higher paid graduate positions than women, even though they don’t achieve as well at university.
When men doing traditionally female jobs such as nursing and teaching they are more likely to advance higher and more quickly, because their rarity is seen as an advantage. The opposite is true for women doing traditionally male roles. In fact, when more women go into a traditionally male role (eg family doctor), the money and prestige associated with that job is lessened.
Whilst men’s average earnings may be less than they used to be, they are still more than women, even though they may be less educated and achieve less well in their education. And, they are still not doing anywhere near their fair share of home/child work. Maybe addressing this, and properly encouraging men to do their fair share of work in the home and with their family would benefit them. they would have better social connections, both within and outside of family (being involved with children means being involved with their school, friends, neighbours, people in extra curricular activities). They might find it more satisfying.
This interview mostly seems to be privileged dudes whining that they’re slightly less privileged than they used to be.
@Patricia Calderon yep, my sister has multiple post-grad degrees and highly successful well paid career. her husband is a high-school educated bus-driver (and much shorter than her btw), they have a long and successful relationship. but its quite rare to find someone who isn’t intimidated by a woman who earns more or is anyway more successful.
Great interview. Sadly being aware doesn’t help with a solution. In fact, some men are likely to bury their heads further into the sandbox.
This fellow expresses the issues really well but the employment problems aren’t only the fault of politicians. Many (not all) business leaders have arguably played the largest role in pushing various deregulations that weakened job satisfaction & pay.
@An Acc white males have had over 2 centuries of affirmative action and tokenism…suddenly it’s an economic disadvantage? LMAO
The government is how we band together and fight those business leaders/wall street
@An Acc Nope because the males are not performing in academia. As soon as they fall behind they tend to give up and accept bring told they don’t measure up instead of fighting. I regularly see young males just say I am not smart like that over basic academic categories like spelling and very simple math,things past generations got easily
@J Gaffney How are you helping them?
@Red Spiral Ray Not my job. I try to give them advice and a bit of a talk but they often times lack the motivation to try.
I guess you have to buy the book. I listen to this whole segment and I still don’t understand what the problem is with men and boys. And except for a red coat I never heard any solution. I’m now 70 years old and I come from Ireland and when I was 15 I was on my own, wasn’t because I had a bad family had a very good family. In those days ( late 60s) in the UK 15-year-old would start their apprenticeship I went to sea in the Merchant navy.
It is my opinion that it is lead by women, women who say we are equal and we will define ourselves and we do not need men to provide or protect us. So a lot of boys escaped to front of their computers and create their own world and little change as the got older. In general for last 40 year the roles of men and women are changing, for a lot of men this is a real punch to their ego.
The scary thing is there are few creatures more dangerous than an uneducated white, Christian, conspiracy theorist’s with a gun.
Average feminazi*
It’s conspiracy, reports show that absolutely correct. He’s economist he has data. He’s a liberal too.
@Maui Me not everyone will ignore like U do.
In your generation things were different. Millions of jobs weren’t outsourced to CHINA. YOU LIVED THROUGH THE GOLDEN AGE AND THAT AGE IS DEAD.
Maybe there are some evils out tehre
I can explain the lack of college enrollment in my area. We were told that if we didn’t get a college education that we’d never amount to anything. Twenty years later and guys with a GED own their own businesses or are upper management in construction or fabrication while college grads are jockeying for a position in the culinary arts or are stuck in a dead end job with a big corporation, with no room to advance. We were lied to, so that the universities could make a quick buck when most businesses realized what you’re willing to do is more valuable than what you’re qualified to do.
I don’t know about that. For every guy with the GED that did well, there must be more than one like me who went from lower middle class to upper middle class in one generation due, in good part, to a college education. There are plenty of stats on earnings by educational level. My friends with GEDs or H.S. diplomas are not exactly killing it. Actually, they are mostly struggling.
@Andrew Iglinski Many of them speak a second language since English wasn’t their first. And lots of people with a college degree didn’t even take calculus, unless it was a required survey course. You find the lives of men with GEDs to be shameful because you value formal education, which I also value. But there’s a lot to be said for informal education as well. As far as improving one’s self, there are many ways to accomplish that, not just by education. We should not judge.
@DarqJestor I agree with you 100% that formal education does not necessarily equate to bettering yourself. First, I need to point out that there is no such thing as a survey course on calculus, but your point is still valid. I work have a degree in physics but I worked in tech for a while, and it was common for companies to hire a ton of people that got the BS like last week, and then middle management will all have masters degrees, and the team leads or the people that knew how to do just about everything would consist of like 80% masters degrees, maybe a PhD or two, and quite often someone that dropped out of high school. There’s a reason you don’t find that high school drop out in the middle ranks though, they’re the type of people that once they found their niche they dove in 100% and made sure they were not just as good as the PhDs, but better. That isn’t the case with the overwhelming majority of people that believe they should be guaranteed a well paying low skill job in an economy that is rapidly shifting away from a need for low skilled work. The really sad part is that everyone I’ve worked with, especially in tech realizes this. We almost without exception vote to change the economy to favor people that don’t have these skills and to make sure that the bottom is lifted, but these same unskilled… and let’s be honest, low IQ workers vote against everything that we support. There’s a reason there’s such a huge push back against education, and that is *ONLY* because stoopid people vote against their own best interest.
@turnne I don’t think you understand how these comment threads work…
@Andrew Iglinski I agree with most of your comments. A lot of the unskilled work will be automated or just no longer needed, but I think (or at least hope) the workers who support the anti-education agenda are more afraid than stupid. The older ones will die out soon but they’ve convinced their kids that the ‘elite’ intentionally want them to suffer. Also, when I was in college there were survey courses in calculus and statistics. I believe they were for liberal arts majors, to meet state requirements. I can’t remember if they were actually called survey courses but they were just brief, simple, introductory, overviews of the subjects.
Jobs don’t pay enough, everything costs more and there are more things you have to have to participate in society. You have to have a cell phone and be on call all the time to work a job that doesn’t even pay the bills. Not just minimum wage jobs but any job that doesn’t pay at least $75k a year isn’t worth working if you have a degree.
It depends on where you live, in some places 36k a year goes a long way.
@bischnou Thats sad, you should be paid double that or more. Teachers are the most important workers in society they shape the future. Talent cost money and should be rewarded. Instead Wall Street banks fail, get bailed out and then makes millions the next year. Capitalism works but only when managed with societys best interests in mind. That is why a small but well run County like German is so powerful, strong unions and social institutions.
@Hugo Marquez Where is that? I couldn’t pay rent and buy food with that.
@ID10T Its a nice idea but business need labor. Not everyone can be there own boss. Someone has to do all the jobs that keep America operating and everyone who works deserves respect and a life worth living. Some people can’t work or just need help, WWJD?
@Nick Wall Kansas, Nebraska, Oklahoma, many places in Texas, many places in Missouri.
Looking at myself at 77, boys need more time to get serious. I doubled the 2nd high school class twice at 14 & 15 years and they kicked me out of school. Fortunately my parents found another school, who was prepared to give me a 3rd chance. My father showed me the Galvanization Department, where I would have to work, if I failed again! That was the moment I got serious. I finished high school with good notes and went to college to learn about electrical engineering and finished it, passing all tests without issues. I had a nice career and in the end my monthly salary was written with 5 digits.
@ricardo linares Was it a tamale or turkey Thanksgiving, homie?
@Andy Dahl If you understand karma and how compassion guides it then FATE IS OURS TO GIVE and last time I checked the dictionary the key word is LOVE.
The same happened to me. I was sent to work in the fields for two months. I cried every day but left determined to get a college degree. I finished my masters program, have a career that I love and I am glad I sacrificed then to have a good life now.
@Moderator of Youtube – go read your children’s books if you can’t comprehend the adults when they are speaking.
@Moderator of Youtube Nope I actually lost two pounds. Decided that I had nothing to be grateful for and did not want to feel the cringe of a family gathering. Besides Mr. Moderator I lead a life of compassion and give thanks to my fellow man every day. So again are you a Karen or a Chad. People who usually make threats are Karens (some female and some are males). It has been fun distracting myself with you if you are looking to read a good book about masculinity and its toxic effects on everything there is a new Autobiography by Paul Newman. I promise it will make a btter man out of you even if you are a Karen. By the way tamales and turkey rarely get triggered by village idiots.
I had never thought about the positive impact on men from the infrastructure bill. That’s very interesting.
One of the best things that ever happened to me in school was being held back in the 3rd grade. For some reason that is no longer an option. Currently I’m a disabled IT tech with an Associates married to a teacher with a Masters.
Holding students back a year, like giving failing grades, was deemed too emotionally damaging. Unfortunately instead we’ve taken away those warning signs, so parents & students fly through the system, blissfully unaware that they aren’t learning sh*t. Then once they get to upper HS, or enter college, they hit a wall based on lack of study skills, self-care, and foundational knowledge.
It’s hitting girls as well, but due to socio-cultural factors, girls are more likely to “keep up appearances” by still doing their work, while suffering/neglecting other aspects of their life (emotional, social, self-fulfillment, etc). When boys/men struggle, their whole lives fall apart.
Many manufacturing jobs were sent overseas where labor is cheaper, and that has probably hit non-college graduate men hardest.
A high rate of legal and illegal immigration is also a factor. Costs over $100b a year if you strictly look at it from an economic perspective, can lower the wages and change the demand for workers which puts the native born at an unnecessary disadvantage.
@An Acc So you are saying that the majority of businesses are prepared to use illegal workers and pay them “under the table”? To the tune of $100bn?
Really? Have you *THOUGHT* about what you are claiming?
@Holger Lubotzki businesses are using both legal & illegal immigrants. Both drive down wages for American workers.
@Holger Lubotzki You might be surprised
@Holger Lubotzki The Rust Belt cities would like to have a word with you for being ignorant by about 30 years.
I think the problem is the education system as a whole. It doesn’t engage the individual student instead its a one size fits all approach. If you are forced to spend years of your life going somewhere that you don’t enjoy you stop caring.
I have routinely about 200 students in my classes. How do you suggest I engage each and every “individual” student. On the flip side each student can engage with the individual who is instructing the class, if they cared, if they are motivated, if they viewed learning as something to enjoy.
The struggle is real on every level 💖
As an elder elder, I remember when boys graduating from high school could hire into a manufacturing job with a living wage, total medical benefits, sick days, vacations rising with service. This allowed them to marry, buy a home, raise a family. And all this because of organized unions. This began to erode with Ronald Reagan with his trickle down economics, southern strategy and busting the unions. And Democrats actually voted for him! So, what has happened in America is because Americans voted against their own interests. As a mother of two sons I sympathize with men in this unfair environment.
Yup, I agree, the policies of Ronald Reagan decimated the American middle class.
Here with go with the horse shi* with your Democrat comment! You Karens never stop which is a main reason Amerikkka is imploding!
Well said. I also experienced this first hand. We were our own worst enemies.
You said it. I’m sure there are other reasons as well but the attack on working people and unions that jumped into high gear with the criminal Reagan administration has had a huge impact on this situation. And you are right again in that Americans voted against their own economic interests because Reagan and the entire republican political strategy wrapped themselves in the flag or anti abortion or anti gay rhetoric and much of the working class fell for the con. And still do to this day.
I was just waiting for him to blame women for men having difficulties. I was glad to see that he didn’t, however, the people in the comments missed that part. It is always put on us, everything wrong with the world. I am not going to stop pushing simply because men think my success is somehow detrimental to them.
I too was leery of the association that “men declining = women succeeding”. He explicitly said it’s not a zero-sum, but it’s really disappointing that so many read this issue that way. Conservative patriarchy, the fall of unions, and the underfunding & overpolicing of K-12 school have a lot more impact on the fates of men than anything going on with women.
Happy to hear a fair analysis (sociology / economics), as usually you expect to hear a conservative and/or anti-feminists. As a pro-feminist Canadian, I have seen clearly that the suffering men go through is very often ignored or unaddressed. I would dare advance one factor: widespread psychological depression in modern economies, where women may have better coping mechanisms and more social strategies. It is common in many countries. Of course, that does not address the economic situation in the USA as such nor abandoning education (though men using more social/collective strategies could help).
👏👏👏
This guy seems to be blaming “systems” for the failure of men. It was and is still the structure of society that put men in this place. This society it’s systems, it’s rules and regulations all designed to shore-up men’s lives, making men supposedly superior, more intelligent, taught that reason is more important than emotions and even so the only emotion allowable with men is anger and this can only be expressed as aggression, that everything else around men is to be owned and controlled by men this includes women, children and the very Earth itself…. but this isn’t necessarily true in all societies. This is exactly what the Republicans, their sponsors want to put back into place… to shore up men. This isn’t making men stronger, it is feeding their fears and weaknesses.
This assumes that the cause of the increased overdoses, suicides and alcohol related illnesses are due to structural economic factors and levels of education. But it needs to go deeper. Why are our boys and men failing to cope with the life struggles and instead turn to alcohol or drugs, or suicide? Those are all coping mechanisms for deep emotional struggles. It’s more socially acceptable for a boy or man to be angry than to express another emotion. But eventually that anger is so strong that they turn to alcohol or drugs to mask the internal pain, and/or they feel hopeless and take their lives.
Teaching boys and men that emotions, all emotions, are NORMAL and healthy is key. Men and boys need access to mental health supports and a society that encourages social emotional well-being. Providing mental health supports to parents, and helping them to raise emotionally healthy children is the long term way out.
The current trend in society that stokes fear, anger and division is making things worse.
This is a huge part of the problem. Emotional struggles, depression/anxiety, substance abuse – these are all massive obstacles to pursuing & maintaining education, career, family, etc. And the message that “boys don’t feel” starts way early, even before kids start school – same as the sh*tty messages girls get. Basically we’re ruining the next generation, and may already have screwed the current 20-something set.
I was raised in the 60’s and at that time, at least in my family, the expectation was that I’d get married and have children. Nothing was talked about or encouraged in regards to a career path. Well, the rules changed. I was expected to support myself, not remain at home until I married. I had to scramble to find a career. My path was the military.
I recognized in the early 80’s that women were thrown into a duel role that they quickly had to adapt to. Not only were they expected to work outside the home to contribute to family finances, they were also expected to continue following the traditional women’s role in the home. Being the primary caretaker of children, the cook, housekeeper and everything that a traditional housewife would do. Men were not adapting or expected to change a thing. This is a generalization, I know, but overall that was the case. We/females were hearing slogans about how “You can do it all”. Basically, you can work two full time jobs and husbands were still going to work, coming home and asking what’s for dinner, mowing the lawn on weekends, taking the garbage out and keeping the cars clean.
Not a fair division of labor. I was of course also expected to be the one who took time off of work when the children were born or when they were sick and couldn’t go to school or daycare. Paid less then my male co-workers doing the same exact job and at the same time expected to take on additonal responsibilities that they weren’t.
Women adjusted, men didn’t and now are being forced to. Also boys and men are much more addicted, for those that do play, to video games. It really is an addiction and it really does suck the life and motivation out of them.
Misandry is a clumsy salve for misogyny.
Okay boomer
@Klemheist Truth hurts! I’m Gen X. My mother did exactly what Coleen described. I decided that I would never marry, never have kids & only concentrate on getting good in STEM, so I wouldn’t have to work 5 jobs at once for an arsehole who would cheat on me when he would reach his 40’s. Tough luck, lazy bastards! She doesn’t hate men, but I did and still do!
Dual (not duel) You are right. Women got the short end of the stick. At the same time expected to hod a full time job and still responsible for the upkeep of the home, raising the children, cooking, laundry, etc. Men had it easy, one job and mowing the lawn on the weekends. In some countries, women resisted feminism for that very reason. They could see that American women just doubled their responsibility and it wasn’t fair.
@Juicexlx Thank you for making my point.
The earning issues isn’t a male specific one, that’s across the board, people are being squeezed by employers to pad the cooperate profit margins. The higher mortality rate was also normal in past generation as well, there’s a lot that needs to be done to help men redefine their role in society into one that’s not some kind of hysterically defined dominance of all others but as peers with women.
When it comes to development in childhood, a blanket policy of starting boys later is I suspect, too uniform. We need to spend a lot more energy on working with kids and teaching the students we have rather than forcing the kids to fit like widgets into a static assembly line system. So maybe that means boys start academics a bit latter when their brains are up for it, but really it should be more like each student is allowed to follow their interests/noses over the year. They might have a basket of things that need to be covered but there’s more than one way to learn a thing, and when they do should be decided by when they are engaged, not when a wrote system forces them to.
This means more teachers, who are paid more including for the prep work and one on one time needed. We spend billions on weapons but cheep out on education, that’s just dumb.